So I dragged my butt to Weight Watchers today. I needed a good, hard kick in the arse. Because the past couple weeks has been one big FOOD PARTY in my belly. What with my cousins visiting and… oh, any other excuse I could find to eat bad.
So I’m sitting in WW, when a lady that usually chats with us comes and sits by my aunt (Hi Nina!) and I. She asks about my book. Which really blows me away that people off the street remember I write books. Well, the leader at WW did make a formal announcement that I was a writer awhile back. I have a point, really.
So I’m all excited and telling her how Tourist Attraction comes out two weeks from today! And she gets a bit excited and asks me more about it and how she can buy it. Which then I have to explain epublishing, and she’s mid sixties so it’s a ‘WOW’ concept. So then I have to break the news. She’s not allowed to buy my book though.
I know that’s probably terrible marketing on my part, but seriously. I don’t want people showing up and burning crosses on my lawn. She’s pretty religious. And anyone who I think might, say, keel over and die when they read my first love scene… well, I talk them out of buying my book. Which sometimes makes them want to buy it more.
So then her eyes get wide and she says, “No… you don’t look like the type of girl who’d write that kind of book. You seem too innocent, like you wouldn’t know anything about it!”
And at this point other ladies in the meeting are turning around and looking at me.
Then she goes on to ask the standard question writers get asked… ready? “Where do you get your ideas?”
“We-ell…”
“Do you do all the stuff you write about?”
My aunt’s starting to look horrified.
“No, of course not.” But I want to. I’m a single mom who hasn’t gotten action in three years.
“Well, I’m sure it’s not that bad.”
“It really is.” There’s a point where I use the word vacuuming and it has nothing to do with a household chore.
And this is my mid level steamy novel! Not even the hard core one. The next one The Pirate’s Booty, will send any conservative into anaphylptic (I really should know how to spell that word, I was a Medical Assisant) shock.
Anyways, even though I did everything in my power to convince her not to buy my book, I still ended up giving her my business card with the cover and publisher on it. Der.
The next blog entry will hold the time and date of a prayer meeting that’s being held to pray for my soul. 
p.s. Oh, and I gained 2.5 lbs
